I’ve been thinking this week about how much G. loves. Not only me personally, but how much he loves people that I feel helpless to love. This morning I was at the post office trying to mail something to the United Kingdom. Mailing things here can be so difficult. You have to seal the envelopes with this special glue stuff, and buy which feels like a million stamps. So finally I had everything on the envelope that was required and I handed it to the lady behind the counter and she said…. “this is the wrong envelope you will have to use another one!” I wanted to yell at her… “how can this be the wrong one, you gave it to me!” So out with the forms and into the right envelope, pasting everything on again. And before we even mailed it the lady tells us they are not responsible if the letter doesn’t make it to another country, or anywhere in China for that matter! About 25 minutes later we leave the post office….while I silently thank G. I can’t speak the language so well or I would have let that lady have it! I was thinking of a million smart remarks in my head… then I remembered what I read in Matthew this morning. “Knowing the correct password-saying Master, Master for instance-isn’t going to get you anywhere with me. What is required is a serious obedience-doing what my Father wills. I can see it now-at the Final judgment thousands strutting up to me and saying, Master we preached the message, we bashed the demons, our God sponsored projects had everyone talking. And do you know what I am going to say? You missed the boat. All you did was use me to make yourselves important. You don’t impress me one bit. You’re out of here.” (Matthew 7:21-23 the Message) There is a road in between Langfang and Beijing called the Jing Jin Tang or interpreted “the highway of death” It is a dangerous road and really the only direct road to get to Beijing from our house. There are often traffic jams on this road, where you have to wait and shut off your car until traffic begins to move again. The other night Noah was driving back to Beijing late and he was stuck in a traffic jam, so he turned off the car engine. He was stuck in between trucks and all he could see was darkness and trucks all around him. He told me he thought about hell and how it will feel like eternal stuck ness, where you can’t move one way or the other, and where there will be no escape. Today as I think about the post office incident and what I read this morning I feel the need to beg G. to change the state of my soul and cause my heart to long for serious obedience! The obedience of LOVE and GRACE for others at any cost to myself and my own comfortableness for the sake of the Kingdom. I pr. that G. will change my heart and give me grace for people at the post office and all around me who are headed for eternal stuck ness without any way of escape! “Change my heart Oh G. Make it ever true. Change my heart Oh G, may I be like you!”